Encourage One Another

Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behaviour. Instead, be kind to each other, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children. Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.
Ephesians 4 v29b to 5 v2 (New Living Translation)

How can we encourage one another?
First, words.
Hello, how are you?
Fine thankyou. And you.
Not so bad.
A bit nippy.
Feels like snow.
That is a typical winter conversation I have with certain people on my way from the office to home and back somewhere on King St or Low St. The summer conversation might not mention snow. Recognise anything there? You’re right, I do superficial conversation like most of us. Could have been me opening the conversation. Could just as easily be me replying.
And we do it in church too, don’t we?
Now I don’t want you to be embarrassed at the end, and think you must immediately either engage the first person you talk to in deep and meaningful conversation or make a beeline for the door. Most of our daily conversations will still take place at the top of the layer. By layer I mean that we all have different layers at which we relate to people. I might say ‘not so bad’ when the truth is I’m seriously depressed. I might say ‘fine thankyou’ even though my closest friend has just died or I’ve been diagnosed with a life-threatening disease, or my life is in such a mess I don’t know where to turn.
Still, I don’t really want to talk about it anyway.
Thus there is a mutually acceptable surface layer interaction.
Don’t knock it. It has to be better than going around grumping and glaring at one another. Even a friendly smile works wonders, doesn’t it.
Smile at your neighbour.
’There is a measure of encouragement we can give even at surface level isn’t there. A warning from the book of proverbs however……’if a man loudly blesses his neighbour early in the morning it will be taken as a curse’. I've done that! A measure of sensitivity is needed even at this level, especially early in the morning!
We can go that little bit further, however:
Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. Eph. 4v29b
When Sigmund Freud discovered that symptoms of emotional distress could sometimes be relieved simply by talking in certain ways to his patients he was puzzled and intrigued. Years of medical training had conditioned him to think of people as merely biological and chemical entities. Had Freud looked into the book of Proverbs he would have been less surprised to discover that mere words can have such strong impact:
Death and life are in the power of the tongue 18:21
Good words can make an anxious heart glad 12:25
A soothing tongue is a tree of life 15:4
Pleasant words are…..sweet to the soul and healing to the bones 16:24
Like apples of gold in settings of silver
Is a word spoken in right circumstances 25:11
Words are important. They have real power. James warns that although the tongue is a small part of the body, it has the power to determine the whole course of human existence. A chance, thoughtless word can be terribly destructive. Equally a timely word can be tremendously helpful.
I remember going into the Headmaster’s study after my A-level results came through and he tersely summarised how badly I’d done, which left me feeling that after 7 years at the school I was a waste of space as far as he was concerned.
On the other hand I still remember Rev Laurence Morley whose words often encouraged me in my 20s. I can’t remember a thing he said but I can remember how good it felt to be on the receiving end of his timely word. He died almost 30 years ago, but I remember him with a smile because of his humour and gentleness.
A breathing space here because I know you can remember such people too. Pause for a few seconds bringing to mind the people of encouragement you remember.
Now ask yourself this question: ‘Who can I speak an encouraging word to today’?
‘Let everything you say be good and helpful…’Eph 4v29b

Taking encouragement to the next stage:
It has to go deeper than words ….we can all do ‘lip service’, but more is needed:
…. be kind to each other, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. ’Eph 4v32
Larry Crabb writes ‘Christians committed to serving others (and the key word here is committed), will amid the routine of life maintain a conscious commitment to promote others welfare.’ He suggests we choose our words carefully and examine what our motivations are in relation to the other person. If our motivation is so people will like us, then it needs sorting.
I continue to quote from Crabb’s book, ‘Encouragement’; ‘When I contemplate the meaning of proper motivation and God’s demands on my life, I throw up my hands in defeat and admit I simply cannot measure up……Yet I am somehow to develop the strength of character that enables me to be committed to ministry even though it appears that no-one is ministering to me. Where does this strength of character come from?'
'I once talked with a man who spent 3 years in a concentration camp for prisoners of war. During his confinement he resolved to learn the meaning of Jesus’ words " love your enemies and pray for those who despitefully use you". His time in prison provided him with a unique opportunity to test whether the Holy Spirit could forge character of that quality in the hot fires of persecution. And he did. My friend reported that he learned to care genuinely for the welfare of his persecutors.'
How can we develop character like that? Most of us cannot manage to love a Christian sister who talks too much, let alone an enemy captor who beats us mercilessly.’ Well, LOVE is the fruit of the SPIRIT. Filled with the Spirit and trusting in Christ anything's possible.
David Perry reminded us last year of the words of Jeremy Bentham written way back in 1830; ‘Create all the happiness you are able to create: remove all the misery you are able to remove.’
If we are to become real encouragers in the body of Christ, we must if necessary at our own expense and with the purest of motives, ‘Be kind to each other…….’Eph 4v32.

Encouragement then is ultimately an outcome of sincere love for one another. And here I need to narrow down the definition (as we often have to) for this misused word ‘love’. This is much more than we usually understand when we use the word love. This is self-sacrificial love…Greek AGAPE. ‘Greater love has no man than this; that he lay down his life for his friends….’. Love shown supremely in the life and death of Jesus. ‘Father, forgive the for they don’t know what they are doing….’ It is a super-human love, that is to say we don't possess it of ourselves, it is, as we have said, God's gift through His Spirit.
Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. Eph 5v2
Only love can deal with fear. People are hurting; fear is lodged in deep places. We pretend, we hide, we wear masks, and in protecting ourselves in this way we sacrifice vitality in fellowship, blocking encouragement.
Only this AGAPE love can deal with fear.
This is the 'perfect love' that 'casts out fear' 1John4v18.
Only love can break through so we realise the unconditional acceptance we have through the blood of Christ.
And so we are to accept others as God in Christ has accepted us. That is the ministry of encouragement, a good place to begin if our church is to be instrumental in transforming lives beyond these doors.
Finally a word from scripture:, ‘Consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds; not forsaking the assembling of yourselves together…but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.’ That’s Heb 10.

http://www.davecheong.com/2006/07/12/8-simple-things-you-can-do-to-encourage-others/